Comments on: Who is included in the rehearsal dinner? Who can give a bridal shower?

By: D4Pres2012

D4Pres2012 — Fri, 05 Jun 2009 05:23:59 +0000

I would say yes, the bridesmaids’ dates come to the rehearsal dinner. what are they gonna do, sit in the hotel alone while the bridesmaids party the night before the wedding? if your in laws have a problem with that, offer to pay for the dates’ meals. anyone can give a bridal shower, traditionally it’s the bride’s mother or other female relative, or the bridesmaids all go in together on the shower expense.

By: texascutie

texascutie — Tue, 02 Jun 2009 03:23:23 +0000

The rehearsal dinner is usually reserved for the bridal party significant others, their children and family members as well as out of town guests. If you feel the expense for the rehearsal dinner is more than can be expected from the Groom’s family offer to help out. Or downsize your location or food selection to meet their budget.
The bridal shower is usually hosted by the Maid of Honor and/or the Bridesmaids. Miss Manners does not approve of the mother hosting a shower for her own daughter (call it conflict of interest). If you mom wants to let her- it’s your day anyways. I had 2 showers one hosted by the ladies group at his church and one hosted by the ladies group at my church. Most of my Bridesmaids were from out of town and did not attend either of the Bridal Showers.

By: betney109

betney109 — Sun, 31 May 2009 17:56:44 +0000

Ask the grooms family if it would be a problem to pay for out of town guests to bring there S.O or guest. It shouldn’t be. But, if it is…ask them if it would be okay for the guest to come if they paid for their own plate. I’ve been to a rehearsal dinner that had extra guests pay before hand for their plate. Not usually a big deal.

Anyone who wants to throw a shower can…cousins, aunts, ladies at church, bridesmaids, friends, mom, mother-in-law to be….it doesn’t matter.

By: ?

Sun, 31 May 2009 01:04:37 +0000

Traditionally, the groom’s family pays for the rehearsal dinner and the wedding party (and S/O’s) attend. Normally, the mother of the bride does not give the shower, that is the responsibility of the MOH or bridesmaids.

By: Sweet J

Sweet J — Fri, 29 May 2009 07:34:52 +0000

For my rehearsal dinner we weren’t going to invite the bridal party’s S.O.’s…But, my fiances parents(who are paying for it), said it would be rude not to.

By: Soon-to-Be Mrs. Taylor

Soon-to-Be Mrs. Taylor — Tue, 26 May 2009 10:46:31 +0000

If you’re going to have out-of-town BMs at the dinner, then you should invite their SO also. The groom’s family doesn’t have to pay, but its the ‘traditional’ route. Nowadays, anyone can pay for anything; the rules no longer apply. So if the groom’s family don’t mind or offer to pay, let them. If not, either do a simple gathering at someone’s house (potluck style) or say you’re going to meet at a particular restaurant and let guests know that they will have to pay for their own meal. Do what’s within your limits; going into debt to show off is not necessary. Also, anyone can give the bridal shower. My BM is giving mine, but its optional. No pressure.

By: Amanda H

Amanda H — Sun, 24 May 2009 04:57:23 +0000

If you have a brides maid coming form out of town, it would be appropriate to allow her to bring her SO to the dinner if he accompanying her from out of town (that would indicate a more serious relationship). Depending on the size of your bridal party, rehearsal dinners can get rather large and expensive, but it is generally customary to invite you immediate families, and out of town family to attend. But, in the end it is up to you and you can draw the line wherever you wish based on your personal circumstances.

Traditionally, the brides mother does not throw the wedding shower, but tradition is out the window these day. If you mom is the one who wants to orchestrate it, then let her. I see no problem with that.

By: Bethany

Bethany — Wed, 20 May 2009 20:20:27 +0000

Usually the rehearsal dinner is reserved for the bridal party. And the maid/matron of honor is usually responsibile for throwing the bridal shower.

But… its your day so do it how you want.

By: Blunt

Blunt — Wed, 20 May 2009 08:58:35 +0000

My in-laws paid for our rehearsal dinner. We were going to host it, but they insisted in paying for it.

All the wedding party, plus their Spouses/gf/fiance’s and their children and all out-of-town guests were invited. It was about 30 people.

It’s in poor taste for the MOB to host a bridal shower. It’s an etiquette faux pas for you mom to do this for her own daughter.

Good luck

By: Wedding Plannner and now B2B too

Wedding Plannner and now B2B too — Sun, 17 May 2009 16:07:10 +0000

The rehearsal dinner is for the bride, groom, immediate family, wedding party and out of town guests. that includes each persons wedding guest as well.

Anyone can give a shower-there are not definite rules on that